Basically, I give you meatballs because I’m too impatient to make meatloaf. They’re pretty much the same thing, except one is ball-shaped and one is loaf-shaped. Plus, if you’ve watched this show AT ALL, you know I love balls. They are so fun to eat!
So here’s how I make meatballs, with an impromptu sauce and everything! Learn to cook how I cook, where everything is magical and nothing is planned but somehow everyone still gets a glittery unicorn and a big plate of balls and a million dollars for dessert.
- For meatballs:
- 1 lb ground beef, or a combination of beef and pork
- 1 egg
- ½ cup dryish, starchy particles (breadcrumbs, oatmeal, cornflakes, you get the picture)
- ½ c finely chopped onion
- 1 clove garlic, minced
- handful parsley (1/4-1/2 cup), chopped
- 1 t each salt and pepper
- For sauce:
- 14 ounce can whole or chopped tomatoes
- 8 ounce can tomato sauce
- 2 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 teaspoon oregano
- 2 teaspoons dried basil
- ¼-1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes
- ¼ teaspoon salt
- Mix all meatball ingredients together with your hands and form into 1.5 inch balls. You’ll probably get around 12 balls.
- Brown over med-high heat in a small amount of oil.
- Then add the canned tomatoes, tomato sauce, garlic, oregano, basil, red pepper, salt. Cover and turn heat to low. Simmer about 20 minutes.
- Meanwhile, cook you up a pound of noodles or what-have-you.
- Check on your balls. If the sauce is thin, cook with the lid off for another 10 minutes or so. Too thick, add a tablespoon or two of water or wine. (Make sure you leave the back door open to let the unicorns inside.)
- Eat your spaghetti and meatballs dinner.
- Then Richie Rich will stop by with dessert.
- Bone appeteet!
Serve meatballs with pasta or crusty bread and a salad with homemade vinaigrette!
The LEARN TO COOK Book is Here!
By popular demand, Learn to Cook is now available in print! Over 300 pages of knowledge between two soft covers.
Learn To Cook is designed to get you cooking for yourself like a civilized human being! Drawing from a lifetime of cooking and over two years experience making instructional cooking videos, author Hilah Johnson has produced a beginners’ cookbook for today’s young adults. The casual, straightforward style will appeal to anyone with a sense of humor and the focus on fresh, simple recipes will appeal to anyone who loves to eat. The book includes chapters on menu planning, knife skills, grocery shopping and more, plus a comprehensive spice chart and over 150 recipes from breakfast to dinner to snacks in between.
I create short-form, educational, and occasionally hilarious cooking videos geared towards beginner and intermediate cooks, as well as people who are just looking for simple, low-cost recipes. Everything is made from scratch, people!
{ 34 comments… read them below or add one }
This is, hands down on my balls, my favorite episode!! love all the balls and shit lingo.
Swear on your balls?
Hilah, dang girl you rocked those balls! The only thing different we do is put parmesan cheese and a tablespoon or two of milk in the mix, also fresh basil is nice. My hubby is italian and loved these meatballs! oh btw you didnt offend my italian hubby, he thinks your a riot! But italians dont call it sauce, its GRAVY baby! love ya, Hi-lah-rious!
Thank you, Sharon! Parmesan sounds awesome in these. I’ve been thinking about meatball subs lately – I think I need to try your recommendations. Tell your husband thanks, too!
Meatwads!
This is not the real Gordon Ramsay, is it?
Yes, it's him.
You refuse to identify the meat defining these balls….
You've found your own solution for Austin's homeless population haven't you?
That's the beauty of this recipe, Allan. You can use ANY meat your heart desires: cows, turkeys, pigs, long pigs, you get the picture!
Can I use Captain Crunch instead of bread crumbs?
Probably you can, if you mash them up and you enjoy sweet meat. Personally, I LOVE me some sweet meat.
i like meatballs. i make them all the time. yummy!
Send me a picture!
Lovely video, I'm glad I found your site. Was that Gordon Ramsay? LOL.
I love your blog, Anna!
I'll tell Gordon you say hi.
Dear Hilah!
Greetings!
Meat balls must rate as one of the universal gastronomic delicacies enjoyed by all as even vegans do come with their meatless balls!
One technique I use to avoid any bad surprise is to oil my palms and roll the meat balls in them, and then fry them a little time on a very high fire. I then flambee them with a little whisky (comes out sweet) and cover them with a lid and let them cook on a small fire/or I bake them in the oven,then.
Actually, an elf told me he rolls them in flour, flambe them on hot oil and bake them for a finish until they are dark and crispy outside!
Cheers,
Old Dragon
Oh, my old dragon friend! That sounds delightful! Lighting food aflame is such fun while dark, crispy outside makes everything better.
Yours,
h
Um, was there a “Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead” shout out in this episode? If so, my wife Stefanie totally caught it. In fact, she's telling me that I shouldn't ask if there was a shout out, cause she totally knows there was. So don't try to lie about it.
She also wants me to ask if the dishes are done?
The dishes are done, man.
where is emerill
Hi Hilah,
I made your meatballs and they were delicious. Thanks
Wonderful! Thank you!
I think you are awesome!! don’t change a thing…..you make it fun to learn how to cook!! Love it!!
Hooray! Thanks, Bob! This makes me happy.
I made this yesterday but I changed it up a bit.
Removed the parsley (I don’t like parsley)
ADDED BACON (quite good!)
Heaps of Parmesan.
Delicious! I never made meatballs before and now I feel confident enough to make them again
Awesome, Janice! Sounds like you made great modifications. Love it! Keep it up!
Hey you’re pretty funny. I’m originally from Massachusetts. Your video of cooking a lobster made me homesick for a lobster. Love your comments while you cook. You are very down to earth!
Hello Susan! It’s great to hear from you. I lived in Marblehead Mass for a year once. It’s a beautiful part of the country.
I’m so glad you like the show. Thanks for writing!
-h
Hilah, these are some pretty awesome meatballs! I made them and instead of pasta I used them on a meatball sub, it was sooooooooooooooo yummy! Me and my fiance have made a couple of the other stuff on your website, you do a great job. Thanks for posting
Oh that sounds so divine, Priscilla! Yum! Thanks for writing!
Hi Hilah:
These meatballs are the bomb! Instead of using ground beef, I used ground turkey and it was just as good. If I wanted to sweeten things up a bit, could I add a bit of sugar to the recipe and if so, at what point? Thanks again,
Joe
PS: So I don’t dirty up your nice book, I copy down the recipes on a sheet of paper and keep that beside me. Nothing worse than an open book when cooking and stuff splattering all over it.
Hi Joe!
Very glad to hear it worked well with turkey! I’d add no more than a tablespoon of sugar when you add the tomatoes next time if you like. Let me know how it goes!
Hi Hilah:
I wrote to you before re: your meatballs and your suggestion to add a tablespoon of sugar really added to the flavor of the sauce! Thanks. Another question please: in your recipes and many others that I see, butter is used to either fry or saute something. Im not a fan of butter and I don’t use it at all (except if Im baking and even then in a very small amount so I don’t taste it) so can I use olive oil as a replacement instead or another type of oil? Thanks again, Joe M.
Great! Thanks for the follow-up, Joe!
Yes, in most recipes oil will work fine as a replacement for butter. If the recipe calls for a lot of butter (like more than a couple tablespoons) you’d probably be best off replacing it with a mild-flavored oil as opposed to an extra-virgin olive, which has a strong flavor that might overwhelm the dish in amount like that.