Welcome to the Baby Jungle
We did it. We made a baby. Flint D. Sharpe, born October 28. After the easiest pregnancy and the fastest delivery ever (just over 6 hours, what?!!? My uterus is amazing.) we finally have the baby for whom we’ve waited over two years [ICYMI, read about the depressing Molar Pregnancy of 2012 here].
It’s bananas. After nearly 10 months of being pregnant, you’d think you’d be totally ready for the actual baby. But baby, you ain’t. I still look at him sometimes and think, “That’s my baby? I have a baby? Where’d this baby come from?”. Granted it’s just been ten days. I’m sure I’ll get used to it eventually. Some observations Chris and I have made over the first week:
Your house smells different as soon as you bring a baby into it. Eau de bebe is a mixture of poop and vomit and pee and spoiled milk and when you take all those things together, you’d imagine that your house literally smells like a landfill. But it doesn’t. Not quite. There is a nice, good smell mixed in there, too. Baby breath, maybe. Baby head, definitely. Baby tummy, most definitely.
Sleep deprivation is a drug. Sleep deprivation mixed with the adrenaline and elation of a brand new baby plus some hospital-grade pain killers will make you feel like you’re on acid for the first few days after you bring baby home. Not like, full-on hallucinations (that would be dangerous) but like the 30 minutes of body-high that you feel before the acid kicks in. It’s kind of awesome, but try not to drive anywhere.
Having a newborn is like having the best/worst 24-hour-slumber party. In a way, it’s kind of fun to be the only ones awake at 3:30 in the morning. In the same way, it is super boring the be the only ones awake at 3:30 in the morning. On one hand, it’s fun to wear your pajamas/yoga pants/bathrobe/tank bra/fuzzy socks all day. On the other hand, all your comfy clothes smell like spit-up. You don’t have to worry about anyone freezing your bra after you go to sleep, but then again, a frozen bra would feel really awesome against your super-sore boobies.